me
"Aye"
Yanee
05/01
On my stereo: Justin Timberlake's Summer Love
Mood: Erratic
"Nay"
veggies:
swallowing pills:
high heels:
skirts:
not knowing what to do:
mess:
wishlist
a bit more freedom
PSP
new laptop
more clothes, for goodness sake!
new phone
an orange scrambler
makeover my room
Thursday, December 29, 2005
If you have..sorry..scratched that..If you had someone whom you love whole-heartedly and suddenly, without a word or warning, this someone ignores your calls, messages and countless tries to get thru to him/her.
Under normal circumstances, you would have just put it off as him/her being busy and/or just unavailable to answer those very very VERY important calls and messages.
Now, in this particular question, we are not in a normal circumstance. You see, try adding the fact that you (woohoo!) managed to get thru to his/her house phone after many, many tries to do so. In your desperate (yesh..i got used to the idea that i am desperate) position, you ask the blardy a**hole (sorry) to pass the phone to him/her, hoping that he/she has some heart to answer it. But noooooooo...no sirree..He/she is adament in not answering the fuckin phone. You try some countless other time and each time, picked up by one of the a**hole(really really sorry). You made a fool of yourself and u thank your pretty ass that technology have not maju until that most phone calls are not made visual.
Anyways, rewind to your phone calls. You call one last time and finally, he/she comes to the phone. BUT. Only to say that he/she is going out and don't u fucking disturb me anymore or i will continue on ignoring you, you fucking bitch!!! (okok fine..he/she didn't say that..but at least that's wad i tot he/she would pretty much would lyk to say. (Right???)
So, you really got your heart broken there. Now, let's try adding another fact, shall we?
Hmm.. this someone of yours. He/she knows this other fren. You know the other fren too. Well, let's just say they are extremely best mates and seriously, you dun mind any of it. Cuz secretly(and mebbe openly) you like that fren of him/her's too. You get along well together until recently. That particular fren is also ignoring you and goes all cold shoulder on you.
Wad do you do?? In all your stupidity and lack of dignity, you continue pressing on the freaking matter. When in fact, deep somewhere in the bottom of the endless pit called the heart, you know that you already lost the battle. But there's another part of that sturbborn you that argues: So what? You only lost the battle. Not the war.
And so, you persist on your conquest of finding out what really is happening. Problem is, things are not made easier when both of your subject of matter go flying in the wind. Both are ignoring you. Both are sick and tired of your presence. Both don't give a fucking shit about you. You finally realise.
'Both don't love you anymore you idiot. Why are you still freakin' here? GO! SHOO! Run away with your tail between your legs. You lost one and you lose all, you fucking idiot.'
Imagine you haf to hear that every minute, every hour, every day and everytime you are being reminded of them.
Goddamit stop it. It hurts.
And so, as a summary, lemme just ask..What do you do when u really love someone so bad, it hurts at night when you think of them. It hurts during the day cuz you noe you won't get to meet them anymore. It hurts every single freakin time that you are being ignored.
What do you do when he/she does not give a clue as to what's happening but in fact, you should noe cuz this is about your baby that im talking about. That precious someone you can't live without.
Email me at alyssa_5126@hotmail.com your answer-advice.
Now i wanna go sit at toilet bowl and go cry k?
If u hear me sobbing pathetically, dun bother and walk away.
Cuz i don't need pity. i don't need comforting.
I need you.
<~ perfected ~>
@ |8:21 AM|
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